What a difference a week makes! After last week's discodebacle, Glee's Whitney Houston tribute episode gets a win! The episodebegins -- as promised by spoilers leaked yesterday -- with Rachel, Kurt,Mercedes, and Santana's gorgeousacapella version of "How Will I Know." Nope, there's no "here'swhat you missed on Glee" or anypreamble of any kind. This simple performance, plus the hashtag#GLEEremembersWhitney at the bottom of the screen, sets the somber tone for theevening. Read on for my recap – but stay away if you have yet to watch last night's Glee!
Will is confused as to why the New Directions are stillso bummed out about Whitney's death. "I will always love Whitney,too," he says (first Whitney lyric pun of the night!), "but you'dthink after two months they'd let it go." Emma hands him one of her niftylittle pamphlets. This one is titled: "Princess Di: Why I Can't StopCrying." And there it is, kids – the show's explanation as to why they'redoing this episode now, two whole monthsafter the fact. (Even though the realreason is because it takes about two months for an episode of Glee to go from production to airing.)
Will gives the New Directions their Whitney assignment,and conveniently explains to them -- and the viewing public at large -- that"this week isn't about passing judgment on Whitney, it's about celebratingher legacy, honoring her memory, her accomplishments." As Will so astutelyobserves, they're all going to be saying goodbye soon. So in grand Glee tradition, we're all gonna work outour feelings through song!
An adorable boy named Chandler flirts with Kurt atBetween the Sheets (get your head out of the gutter – it's a sheet musicstore). They flirt-text back and forth for two days, unbeknownst toBlaine. When Rachel asks him why, Kurt explains that he and Blaine are sufferingfrom Lesbian Bed Death (which is when two lesbians date for long enough and theybecome more like sisters than lovers). OK, first of all, Kurt and Blaine arenot lesbians. Secondly, I'm finding it very hard to believe that two virileteenage boys in love aren't having sex, like, all the time. Anyway, Blaine finds out and he and Kurt have a hugefight and he tells Kurt, "It's not right. But it's OK" (secondWhitney lyric pun of the night!)
Later, during some illegitimate couples counseling withEmma, Blaine confesses why he's really so upset—he doesn't want Kurt to leave."You are the love of my life, Kurt, and I am pissed off that I have tolearn what being alone is going to be like." Way to tug at myheartstrings, Glee! Kurt promiseshe's not going to lose him, but let's face it -- long distance relationshipsdon't usually work out so well, especially when you're a teenager.
Blaine isn't the only man in Kurt's life who doesn't wanthim to leave. Kurt's dad Burt has a little breakdown of his own. "You andme, we made each other men," he says. "It's just that sometimes Iwant my sweet little boy back. I'm gonna miss you, Kurt. A lot." And thusbegins my full-on sob-fest.
Meanwhile, Quinn and Joe totally have the hots for eachother! But Quinn's convinced he's "grossed out" by her because she'sin a chair. Whatever Quinn. I know you can't see me, but I'm rolling my eyes atyou right about now. Joe asks Sam for… sex advice?! He's been havingin-his-pants kinda feelings about Quinn and doesn't know how to reconcile thatwith his religion. Sam basically tells him to have sex with her, saying thattimes are different now than they were when the bible was written. Later, Joestretches Quinn at physical therapy and she, um, feels his, um, excitement on her leg. They have alittle chat and come to the conclusion that they're not boyfriend andgirlfriend, they're not just friends, they're not friends-with-benefits… they'resomething new. Uhh, what else isthere?
Will books Mr. Lavender (Northwestern Ohio's premierewedding planner!) for Emma because he wants to move the wedding up to May. Justin time for the season finale! How convenient! But the wedding plans don't govery well – it's too late to book the kind of venue they want. Will breaks downand tells Emma he doesn't want to get married without the New Directions kids,and she tells him that even if they get married in December, the New Directionskids will be there. It's a reallysweet moment, but I don't quite get it – what did they decide? Also, I think it's high time Will got some age-appropriate friends.
Best moment of the night:
Puck (after handing out shot glasses to the boys in thelocker room): "The clock's ticking, and the time's coming where we're allgonna have to say adios, some of us forever. I want to make sure you guysremember all the bro-ness that we had together, and the great things weaccomplished, forever. I know I haven't always been the perfect friend orteammate, but you've stuck by me, forgiven me for sleeping with your women. Noteveryone in my life has done that. One cougar's husband chased me around with agun. Anyways, I'm only gonna say this once. I'm gonna miss all of you. I loveyou guys. Cheers."
All in all, I deem the Whitney episode a smashingsuccess. But am I the only one who missed "Greatest Love of All"?
"How Will I Know"
Performed by: Rachel, Kurt, Mercedes,Santana
Grade: A- (Beautiful, but I wish it wasn't so overproduced)
"I Wanna Dance With Somebody"
Performed by: Brittany andSantana
Grade: A (Amazingness. We don't get to hear Brittany sing enough! AndBrit and Santana recreating the music video is awesome!)
"Saving All My Love For You"
Performed by Joe and Quinn
Grade: B- (Joe is supremely sexy, but this is a snoozefest.)
Performed by Rachel and Santana
Grade: C(It's a weird, too-fast version and kind of unnecessary.)
"It's Not Right But It's Okay"
Performed by Blaine
Grade:B+ (Darren Criss, as always, is great, but it's not exactly my favorite Whitneysong.)
"I Have Nothing"
Performed by Kurt
Grade: A- (It's a beautifulsong, and Chris Colfer has a beautiful voice. It might have been in slightlytoo high of a key, though.)
"My Love is Your Love"
Peformed by: The whole cast!
Grade:A (Touching and beautiful. Great way to end the episode.)