Oh, the perils of being in a wildly popular boy band. One day you’re invited to perform at the White House, the next you’ve been requested to play at Johnny Depp’s place ― how will they ever get a moment’s peace?

No, but seriously, we’re wondering if One Direction’s popularity is starting to drive them crazy crazy crazy, because now it seems like every star with a daughter of a certain age is requesting a private concert. Suddenly One Direction is being pulled in about 50 directions by celebrities who seem to have taken the album title Take Me Home too literally. And how do you choose between Tim Burton’s muse and the First Family?

At some point, the boys may need to put their foot down and say enough is enough, but for now, let’s see which famous daughter has an edge when it comes to taking 1D home.

History

Michelle Obama recently asked 1D to perform a thank you for her daughters for their help in the reelection campaign, though no date has been set yet. Previously, she invited the Fab Five to the White House for Easter, but they were unable to attend.

Meanwhile, Johnny extended an impromptu invite to “jam” at his place when he learned the lads were in LA over the weekend, and all but Zayn stopped by for a photo op. Here, Lily-Rose Depp clearly has the edge, because the White House doesn’t allow for the same kind of spontaneity as Chateau Depp.

Edge: Depp

Perks

Sure, One Direction would probably love to pop by the set of whatever Tim Burton movie Johnny Depp happens to be filming at any given moment, and we’re certain the Pirates of the Caribbean star could pull in plenty of favors. But nothing beats making nice with the leader of the free world and getting an all-access pass to the White House.

Edge: Obama

Sympathy

The Obamas just earned another 4 years in the White House, so things are going pretty swimmingly over there. Lily-Rose, on the other hand, is coping with her father’s split from mother Vanessa Paradis, which means she could probably use a boy band distraction or five. But which of the boys’ shoulders will she choose to cry on?

Edge: Depp

Fear

Face it ― we love Johnny Depp, but he’s not particularly intimidating. Even in his more villainous turns, like Sweeney Todd, he’s more kooky than creepy.

Barack Obama, on the other hand, is not a man to be messed with. Say you turn down his invitation to play at the White House ― the boys might find their travel visas suddenly expired. Or possibly even be whisked off to a remote island prison somewhere, never to be heard from again. We’re not saying Obama would do that, just that he could. And why take chances?

Edge: Obama

Winner: Well, there's an easy solution here. There are five boys, and three girls. We award Lily-Rose with Harry and Liam, while Sasha and Malia can keep Zayn, Niall, and Louis.

(Photos via Twitter and Fameflynet.)