You know how sometimes you look at a couple, and they’re so cute together, and you wonder how they ever could have been apart, and know it was just meant to be?
This is not a post about those couples.
In 2012, we saw some odd celebrity pairings, some really odd celebrity pairings, and some totally WTF bonkers celebrity pairings. Granted, some of these turned out to be mere rumors, and we never can tell what’s going on behind closed doors when there are no paparazzi around. But let's just assume the worst... because when it comes to Hollywood, the worst is usually what's happening.
So let’s take a look back at the year’s weirdest celebrity couples, ranked from least WTF to most WTF!
It’s not that we don’t like these two together ― we’re just surprised by it. Heath Ledger’s former flame could probably use the laughs she gets from funnyman Jason Segel, given both her personal loss and the incredibly serious roles she gravitates toward. Maybe a little strange, but we give this one our stamp of approval.
17. This Kute Kouple
He’s one of the most-respected musicians in the biz. She’s one of the least-respected celebrities of all time. On the one hand, it’s surprising that ‘Ye wouldn’t search a little harder for a ladyfriend that’s on his level. On the other hand, their egos must complement each other quite nicely.
Katy Perry was feeling burned after her divorce from Russell Brand, so she turned to… John Mayer? Katy strikes us as a strong, decisive woman who could have virtually guy she wants, so we’re not sure why she went after Mr. “Your Body Is A Wonderland,” who has been rumored to be not-so-nice to the many famous ladies in his life. Will it last? Doubtful.
15. Rebound Spice
Meanwhile, one of Russell’s rebounds proved he needed more spice in his life. In the form of a Spice Girl. The two allegedly met after the Olympics closing ceremony and briefly became one before Russell was, surprise surprise, spotted with another woman. Then one became two again.
Compared to the more wholesome lads of One Direction, at least, The Wanted are the “bad boy” band coming out of the UK recently, so it makes a certain kind of sense that Lindsay Lohan might be hanging around. Or at least, it would have in 2006. But now that we’ve seen Lilo’s life spiral out of control for years on end without pause, isn’t Max at least a wee bit worried about the hurricane of drama that follows her wherever she goes?
He’s not a Sk8erboi, and she didn’t say, “See you later, boy.” (At least, not yet.) Avril’s 28 and already once-divorced; Chad is ten years her senior. They’re both musicians who often get made fun of in the press, and also Canadian. Yet the two of them together just feels… wrong, somehow. Maybe because any press that includes the word “Nickelback” feels wrong?
The Kennedys are the closest thing America has to a royal family, so it’s no wonder that country-pop’s sweetheart found herself on Conor’s arm, having fun in the sun in Cape Cod. But Taylor, who tends to go for uber-famous actors and musicians, reportedly came on too strong by buying a house within the Kennedys’ vicinity. Add in the fact that Conor only just turned 18 in July, and this romance isn’t cute ― it’s a little creepy.
11. Kat & Mau5
Who’s ready for a game of Kat and Mau5? You would think these two wouldn’t get along based on their names alone, but the celebrity tattoo artist and the Canadian electro producer have at least one thing in common ― a love of ink. On 12-12-12, Kat Von D let Deadmau5 tattoo her in honor of the unofficial “holiday” ― even though he’d never done a tattoo before. “My new tattoo may look like a drunken third-grader did it, but I sure do LOVE it!!” she tweeted.
Carmen met Simon when she appeared on Britain’s Got Talent this year. (But does Carmen got talent? Debatable.) The two reportedly went on a dinner date, but most recently, Carmen called their relationship status “friends.” (Maybe he heard her sing.)
Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison wedded way back in May 2011, but they're still together. Seriously? Who saw that coming? Their marriage has lasted over a year and a half, which is like, their diamond anniversary in trashy tabloid celebrity years.
Haylor isn’t the only musician-on-musician hookup that’s come out of 1D. If the rumors are true (which Liam insists they are not), then 27-year-old Leona’s a bit of a cougar, given that he is only 19. But seriously. This relationship can’t work, because their names start with the same letter, so it’s too hard to make a cute mashup of their names.
Sorry, but we’re still flabbergasted over how and why Kristen cheated on Rob with the married director of her Snow White movie. That is all.
These two might make a cute pair ― if they were father and daughter. Instead, this May-December romance has everything against it ― he’s 42, she’s 26; he’s over six feet tall, she’s 5’2”; he’s the half-brother of a former French president, she is most famous for saying “You got it, dude!” on a TGIF sitcom. Somewhere, Bob Saget is smiling because this means he thinks he still has a chance.
Ordinarily we take any porn star’s claims that they had sex with a legitimate celeb with a grain of salt, but this is Lindsay Lohan we’re talking about, so who can say? Infamous sky-diving porn star Alex “Voodoo” Torres claimed on a Toronto radio show that Lindsay paid him for sex while Michael Lohan was sleeping upstairs. Ew. We’re going to go ahead and assume this isn’t true, if only for the sake of our sanity.
“Anything Could Happen” ― even this. The two very different musicians split amicably this fall after dating for a year. Yet somehow between these two, it’s Skrillex who has all the Grammys?
This didn’t end up being a thing. But what if it was? The gloom-pop goddess and the shock-rocker were photographed together early this year, prompting speculation that they were an item. We imagine their favorite activities as a couple would be walking forlornly in the rain, fornicating in pet cemeteries, and crying in the dark.
Losing her mother had to be tough, and in times of need, it’s perfectly acceptable to turn to your adoptive brother for a shoulder to cry on. But not a shoulder to nibble on! Bobbi Kristina and Nick Gordon's short-lived engagement has been called off, which is bound to make family gatherings preeeetty awkward from here on out.
Rihanna and Chris Brown getting back together would have been a tasteless punchline back in 2009. Now, it’s reality. We’re not sure about the status of their relationship, but they’ve spent a lot of time both working and playing together, often without all of their clothes on. How could a woman who seems so liberated and powerful in some ways become best known for playing the battered housewife role?
Which 2012 pairing had you saying, "Huh?"
Photos Courtesy of Fameflynet