Last night’s two-hour premiere of Mad Men, per usual, had both substance and style to spare… it was all about death, with one character having a heart attack, two people in Roger’s life biting it, and even Don’s Royal Hawaiian pitch uncomfortably revealing a possible death wish.

But onto more serious matters ― what the hell is the deal with their hair?

Yes, as Mad Men moves into 1968, so do the hair and fashion choices, for better or worse. That means porn star moustaches, big sideburns, and a whole host of other styles you’ll only find worn ironically these days.

Overall, the late '60s have not been kind to the Mad Men gang, hair-wise. We’ve power-ranked them from worst to best below!

 

10. Ginsberg

Oh boy, Ginsberg. What did you do to your lip? While we’re aware that facial hair was an increasing trend as the young’uns broke away from their more conservative parents’ traditional looks, Ginsberg’s awkward moustache was a particular assault on the eyes. If we have to stare at that for the rest of the season we may not to start covering our eyes whenever he’s on screen…

 

9. Abe

Peggy’s boyfriend Abe is clearly trying to join The Beatles. We’re not sure if his upset stomach or his facial hair was a bigger gross-out moment… actually, wait, yes we do: it's the hair.

 

8. Harry

Harry has fully embraced the look of the times with big ol’ sideburns… which make him look ridiculous by today’s standards, but then again, Harry has never exactly been the most debonair of the Mad Men men.

 

7. Betty

Betty’s mid-life crisis continues ― first last season’s weight gain, and now she’s gotten rid of trademark bottle blonde perfection. It’s not that Betty looks bad as a brunette, exactly… but with that extra weight still hanging around, now she’s pretty well unrecognizable from the Betty we used to know, and we kind of miss that platinum ice queen...

 

6. Stan

Stan can rock a beard, and of all the new facial hair on Mad Men, he fares the best. Though we are kind of getting a “young Santa” vibe from him now…

 

5. Peggy

Peggy’s period hair is no-nonsense, going right along with her position of power at the rival ad agency. It’s not necessarily the most flattering look we’ve seen on her, but it does complement the cutting remarks she makes to her lazy underlings at work. You just don't mess with this haircut.

 

4. Roger & Pete

Roger and Pete are pretty unchanged, but since this is a big Roger episode (with Pete barely in it), we need to compliment his ever-classy silver fox look. Though his hair is (unsurprisingly) unchanged, he does wear a rather festive blue suit to work, so even he’s not immune to the times.

 

3. Megan

We might have expected Megan to go with some new mod look, but she’s kept it the same even though she’s apparently a recognizeable soap star now. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

 

2. Silvia

Uh-oh. The end of the episode revealed that Don has taken a new mistress ― sorry, Megan! ― the wife of a new friend, no less. Worse news: her ’68 ‘do is pretty smokin’, and she’s played by Linda Cardellini. After starting Season Six literally in paradise (Hawaii), it seems like Don and Megan are headed for some turbulence in what seems to be an otherwise happy marriage…

 

1. Don

Which brings us to Don, of course, who naturally hasn’t sprouted any facial hair or made any radical changes to his wardrobe. (Thankfully!) If Don were to go all 1968 on us, frankly, we don’t know if we could handle it. But we don’t want to find out. Love ya, Don, never change!

What did you think of this season's hair? Whose was the worst?