This is where I reveal my status as a gamer-nerd: I enjoy videogame movies. I play videogames, and then, when a movie of said game is made, I’ll watch it, mostly because it will either A) Be awesome, or, B) Be so hilariously bad, it will be awesome. So I’ve seen quite a few bad video game movies. The dark and surreal Super Mario Bros. Movie with John Leguizamo in 1993, the Street Fighter movie from 1994 that starred Raul Julia and Jean-Cleaude Van Damme, and even newer ones that could have been cool, but failed miserably, like Max Payne in 2008 with Mark Wahlberg, but let’s get to the point. Tomb Raider. The game franchise in which a scantily-clad archeologist, Lara Croft, grabs history by the nuts and throws it off a cliff.
Why aren't all archeologists this awesome?
Arguably more famous than the games, though, are the movies, which starred actress-turned-humanitarian Angelina Jolie, and mostly had her running around shooting things and being as naked as humanly possible without having the films be rated “X” and, thus, introducing the character of Lara Croft to the world. Not only that, but the Tomb Raider films showed how easy it is for a bad movie to make tons of money if Angelina Jolie is in it wearing a tank top and tiny shorts.
"Hey, guys, I know this script sucks, but if we can get Angelina Jolie to wear tiny shorts..."
And given the recent success of science fiction movies, such as Terminator: Salvation, Star Trek, and other nerd fare, it is only natural that video game movies get a share of this delicious blockbuster pie.
Man, now I really want some pie.
Funnily enough, Dan Lim, who was a producer for Terminator: Salvation, is one of the guys behind the re-boot of the Tomb Raider film franchise. According to this video, there are plans to tell a Lara Croft origin story, only there are rumors that Angelina Jolie will NOT be playing the titular heroine. Who the role will go to is uncertain, but the point is that, as the movie is intended to be an origin story, Angelina may not play the role, unless she is able to go back in time to when she was fifteen.
Her eyes would steal our souls.
Hopefully, this movie will be good, but video game films have the habit of being absolutely terrible. If anything, the film may end up being a vehicle for some hot, as-of-yet unknown starlet to become a nerd icon by portraying Lara Croft on the silver screen. As for me, I’m just wondering when they’re going to make a freaking Halo movie.
Seriously, that would be so awesome!
